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Who Needs Porn When You’ve got Storm Fullbacks

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DYOR Dave: “Who Needs Porn When You’ve got Storm Fullbacks”

DYOR Dave

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I hate to write another article jacking off to the insane success of the Melbourne Storm… wait, no I don’t. It’s not my fault that there are so many astounding achievements and statistical anomalies, that it has become my journalistic duty to investigate what is making the club so successful on behalf of the Punter and Dribbler. If it happens to be in the form of masturbatory dribbler, that’s just an added bonus.

One of the biggest stories to come out of the club this year is the rise of replacement fullback Nicho Hynes, who is currently second for try assists and line-break assists, despite playing only 11 games. Many pundits would have guessed that the Storm would struggle without Ryan Papenhuyzen, but a look back into Melbourne’s recent history proves they’ve been a treasure trove of fullbacks for years.

When Billy Slater debuted in 2003, no one knew at the time that he would change the way fullbacks play the game, and help usher in a period of dominance for the club. In 2005, a young throbber named Greg Inglis joined the club, who despite only playing a handful games at fullback during his time, went on to be one of the greats of our modern game.

As Slater’s career went on and his form only improved, a pale Englishman started making his way through the ranks at the storm, after scoring two tries and kicking the winning goal at fullback in the under 20’s grand final. No one could deny the young lad had talent, but with Slater standing ahead of him, there was no way he would get a run at fullback in the purple jersey.

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2010 saw the salary cap scandal hit the Melbourne Storm like nothing had ever hit them before, forcing Craig Bellamy to restructure his side and blood some young talent. So, Bellamy used his magical coaching powers to turn Gareth Widdop from a fullback into an elite, premiership winning half, and it wouldn’t be the last time he’ll pull this trick.

In 2014, Billy Slater suffered a season ending shoulder injury, forcing the storm to once again dig into their fullback stocks. 20 year old Rockhampton boy Cameron Munster was waiting in the wings, and stepped up to play two seasons at fullback and prove himself to be one to watch for the next generation. When Slater heroically returned from consecutive shoulder surgeries, Bellamy once again waived his magic wand and Munster turned into not just any half, but one of the competitions best.

When Slater finally retired at the end of 2018, Bellamy knew it wouldn’t be an easy task to fill his shoes, and he searched far and wide for a suitable replacement. The two favourites were Scott Drinkwater and Jahrome Hughes with far outsiders Nicho Hynes and Ryan Papenhuyzen barely known by even most storm fans.

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An unfortunate injury to Scott Drinkwater led to Hughes getting the nod for the start of the season, but after Papenhuyzen’s blistering start to his career made it impossible to leave him out of the 17, Bellamy once again waved his magic wand and turned fullback into halfback. Since shifting to halfback, Jahrome Hughes has grown his game to now challenge Nathan Cleary for the status of premier half in the game.

The Storm have taken their game to another level with Papenhuyzen and Hughes in the spine, and amazingly have continued that momentum with Hynes filling in. Already Nicho has lifted the premiership trophy and origin shield, without playing a minute in either game. Imagine how good he’ll be when he does get a run. Just like so many before him, Hynes is tipped to hang up the number one jersey to try a stint in the halves, and if history is any indicator, it’ll be just another to add to the long list.

 

Fancy yourself as a bit of a writer? Got some unqualified opinion and unwavering bias you’d like to share with the world? Send it through to dyor@hellosport.com.au to be featured on the site

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So it Turns out the Big 3 were Holding the Storm Back All Along

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So it Turns out the Big 3 were Holding the Storm Back All Along

DYOR Dave

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It was only three years ago that the Melbourne Storm boasted not just the top three players in the game, but 3 men who had already been touted as future immortals before their career was over.

The dynasty created by Billy Slater, Cameron Smith and Cooper Cronk was unrivalled in its superiority, and the success achieved by these three seemed unmatchable by any team in the near future.

Yet here we are in 2021, 16 rounds into the competition and witnessing a record-breaking season the likes of which haven’t been seen by any club in NRL history.

It seems that among the glory of the days of the Big 3, no one realised that their retirement wouldn’t spell the end of the Storm’s legacy, but instead usher in a newer, better and more successful era.

Some may put this down to new rules suiting their style of play, others see Bellamy’s coaching skills ageing like a fine wine as a reason for this improvement, and while these factors may have played a contributing role, one dramatic shift over the last 3 years has been ignored by the Rugby League masses.

Our team was basically being run by 40-year-olds.

Yes, despite all their skills, knowledge and expertise, there is no denying that at the back end of their careers, the Big 3 were closer to walking sticks than they were to dummies.

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Enter the youthful exuberance of Munster, Hughes, Pap, Hynes, Grant, Cheese, Welch, Fox, Olam, the list goes on and on.

Remarkably, out of the Storm’s preferred starting 17, Jesse Bromwich is the only player over the age of 30.

This new team of young throbbers has already surpassed the success of 2017’s premiership season, with one more win by round 16, and ridiculously, have already scored 9 more 40+ point victories than their previous counterparts.

The fact that this could be achieved while our first-choice fullback and hooker have played less than half the season should scare even the most one-eyed NRL fans.

While the unparalleled footy IQ of the big 3 will be remembered for years to come, the new look Storm is putting their predecessors at risk of being forgotten, as their successful reign is not just being matched by the new generation, but being improved upon as well.

This new school of thought in Melbourne Storm critical theory forces fans to reframe their perspectives of the club’s history. We must honour and recognise the Big 3 for their achievements, but also for paving the way to greater success achieved after the sun had set on their careers.

So as the years roll on, we hope that the exploits of Smith, Slater and Cronk will still be remembered, although it would not come as a surprise if future NRL fans view the Big 3 as merely a precursor to the sheer dominance that followed.

One thing is for sure, if you breathed a sigh of relief as the last of the Big 3 settled into retirement, you were sorely mistaken. The best was yet to come, and it seems like there’s no escape from the Storm’s supremacy, at least for the next 5 years or so.

 

Fancy yourself as a bit of a writer? Got some unqualified opinion and unwavering bias you’d like to share with the world? Send it through to dyor@hellosport.com.au to be featured on the site