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Presenting the 2022 NRL Food XIII

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Presenting the 2022 NRL Food XIII

DYOR Dave

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Rugby League has long been known for producing some of the greatest names ever seen in sporting history, and the current crop of NRL stars is no different.

While names like Fuifui Moi Moi, Will Smith, and former Souths player Ed Murphy will always have a special place in the hearts of dribblers, there’s also a strong contingent of food-related names within our league.

If you’ve ever been watching a game of footy and suddenly felt hungry, it could be due to the subtle yet noticeable prevalence of players named after different food items.

So without further ado, I hereby present to the punter and the dribbler, The NRL Food XIII.

 

1. Rocco Berry

2. David Mead

3. Herbie Farnworth

4. Patrick Herbert

5. Jaemen Salmon

6. Scott Drinkwater

7. Daly Cherry Evans

8. Payne Hass

9. Brandon Smith

10. Aaron Pene

11. Bronson Garlick

12. Corey Oates

13. Tyrone Peachey

14. Fletcher Baker

15. Nat Butcher

16. Egan Butcher

17. Damien Cook

 

Entree/Breakfast is a healthy serving of Oates with a fruit compote made of (Rocco) Berry, (Daly) Cherry, (Tyrone) Peaches, as well as a slice of toast with Hass avocado.

Moving onto the main course we have a pasta dish of Salmon Pene with Cheese and Garlick, topped with two types of Herbs (Herbie and Herbert)

While some dietary experts recommend that you should Drinkwater alongside your meals, a few glasses of Mead will be sure to liven up the culinary experience.

The meals would obviously be prepared by the bench, which is made up of two butchers, a baker, and a cook, while the entire occasion would be hosted by none other than Jacob Host.

 

Fancy yourself as a bit of a writer? Got some unqualified opinion and unwavering bias you’d like to share with the world? Send it through to dyor@hellosport.com.au to be featured on the site

 

Check out the Latest Hello Sport Podcast episode #350 – Trundle Beds

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Break Out the Chinos and Linen – Merivale have Announced their Menus for the SCG and SFS

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Break Out the Chinos and Linen – Merivale have Announced their Menus for the SCG and SFS

DYOR Dave

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With the summer of cricket right around the corner, and the new stadium nearing completion, Sydneysiders will finally be able to eat the overpriced food they love while watching the sports they pretend to like. No longer will people have to choose between a long lunch at Mr Wong’s and an afternoon of cricket, with the two cultural traditions able to be experienced all at once.

The hospitality conglomerate run Justin Hemmes has recently signed on to provide food and drinks at the two Moore park stadiums for the next six years, and they’ve just announced the lineup for this summer, much to the delight of Swans fans who own more pairs of RM Williams’ than they do guernseys.

Vinnies Pizza, Jimmy’s Falafel’s, Queen Chow Dumplings, El Loco Mexican and Paddington’s The Chicken Shop will feature across the SCG this summer, while a French bistro will be serving red wine and steak frites to the upper echelons of the SCG society, the members. It is currently unclear whether or not the red wine will be served in a plastic glass with a vacuum-sealed plastic lid.

This new partnership has been recognised as a significant step forward for stadium hospitality services, with Hemmes saying “The aim has been to provide restaurant quality food in a stadium environment while making sure it’s affordable and accessible.” Never before in Australia has quality food been served in stadiums, nor has any stadium food ever been affordable, let alone accessible, with overwhelming queues at every break of play.

Disrespecting the memory of Sir Don, a famous meat pie operator

Disrespecting the memory of Sir Don, a famous meat pie operator

 

It is expected that the addition of these outlets to the stadium will more than double the average attendances for Roosters games, as the NRL club had been dramatically losing fans to Totti’s reservations and lines outside Coogee Pavilion. Membership numbers have already seen a rise, with unconfirmed reports that a new membership package will soon be launched, providing fans with a $50 Merivale voucher (enough for one cocktail) as well as a signed Champagne cork from Hemmes himself.

Executives at Merivale are relishing the opportunity to employ and probably underpay more than 1000 new staff, who will no doubt enjoy dealing with fans’ expectations of high-class food at low-class speeds and prices. Their first assignment will assumably be cleaning out the grease traps that haven’t been emptied in decades, which are rumoured to be the true source of that distinctive stadium-food taste.

For the traditionalists out there, much-loved staples like $5 meat pies, chips and hot dogs will still be available, as will standard drinks like bottled water and Coke, which still cost $4.50 for some absurd reason. So if you’re craving a bit of old-fashioned mystery meat, you won’t be disappointed.

 

Fancy yourself as a bit of a writer? Got some unqualified opinion and unwavering bias you’d like to share with the world? Send it through to dyor@hellosport.com.au to be featured on the site